thank you for breathing.

❝ Money

( posted on Thursday, October 18, 2012 @ 8:49 pm )

Yes ,Money . Something I'm sure everyone hates and loves at the same time . Love it when you have enough/more of it . Hate when you're short of it . Money in my family has never been liked . Since young ,or at least ,since i remembered things , daddy had to give ah ma money to see doc . When her illness got worse ,he needs to hire her a maid , then ,he had to drive taxi on weekends to make enough money . Then ,Me & sis needed tuition ,so ,things got worse , esp when I'm having my Os . So ,he tried to drive taxi as much as he could . In the past there was no such thing as family day , including PHs . Then Ah ma passed away ,I thought that things would go better for us . At least no more maid ,no more ah ma's super expensive medical bills , & that I could work part time . Hell no . Daddy's stomach got sick ,needed long term medication , every year need to go for scan to make sure nothing happens . Meaning ?Money thrown to hospital & medicine again . Wanna claim from insurance ? they give us bloody un-understoodable papers to fill in .(Yea ,fuck you for that) Then ,mummy didn't feel well either . Every year also need to go check up . I still have half a year more to graduation , Sis ,a week more to Os . The government is always talking about helping those low-income families . Then how about us ? Those that are stuck in the middle of no where ,struggling like mad ? Yes ,we're not poor until we can't get food . Yes ,I know I'm luckier than many people out there that are dying of hunger . But look at their society ,and look at ours . If i'm living in Indonesia/Philippines with the amount of income my parents earn ,I'm sure I won't ever complain . Why ?Cause their standard of living isn't damn high . These days ,even eating in school ,a meal will cost you $3-6 . Bus & MRT fare ?HAH . I don't even wanna recall how many times I hear my parents talking about no money ,wanting to do this ,do that . My daddy's stomach didn't go well because of irregular meals , because of his work ,because he wants the family to live better . Yes ,i complained many times about him . But at the beginning ,when he told me he might get stomach cancer , I cried . Back then ,Ah ma just passed away ,just a few weeks . The thought of losing another family member , my first thought was to just kill me . Sometimes I really ,really really really hope that money would drop from the sky . No need everyday ,once every month ,drop just $500 ,i'll be happy . At least that would settle some medical bill from my family . I believe it will help many too . But ,free stuff will never come .